This song, as of the post date, is for everyone else.
Mind you that I'm preparing for a big party performance on Friday and haven't touched a guitar since August.
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
I'm Not the Only Dust My Mother Raised
Posted by The Shark at 6:00 PM 3 comments
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
Engagement Photos: Who (or What) is the Focus?
It's fairly often that I get a wedding announcement in the mail and end up rolling my eyes. When I get a picture like the one below, I feel like the announcement itself should say what is inherent in the couple's pose, so I did some editing to express this. (Note: I don't know the people in the picture.)
I know that most couples aren't actually thinking this way when they take the shot, but I think if everyone stopped and really thought about what happens when the ring becomes the center of the announcement, they'd find the following:
1) It detracts from the PEOPLE in the picture, the ones we should be celebrating.
2) It's either a really nice ring that shows off your wealth, or it's a really poor ring that isn't worth showing off.
3) It's cliche, cheesy and unnatural.
4) It detracts from the real purpose of the photo: a medium by which the groom's friends can check out and determine the bride's level of hotness.
Posted by The Shark at 4:32 PM 8 comments
Labels: engagement photos, rants
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Dreams: The Sharkmobile Returns!
I'm standing in a kitchen, chatting with my brother Cabeza, when he mentions that a very Indiana Jones-esque world has suddenly appeared down our garbage disposal. Being the skeptic that I am, I decide I'll take a gander for myself. Upon staring down into the sink, the drain opens up into a window and I find myself gazing upon an underground city, filled with ancient ruins. The most prominent landmark of this city is a temple whose entryway is a giant skull with a wide, open mouth and a tongue that also serves as a ramp (good to see that my dreams provide wheelchair-accessible facilities), with a rather large diamond resting in the middle that gleams rather brightly so as to be noticed from some distance.
Cabeza mentions to me that it's a shame the city, which apparently pops up in random places temporarily, has shown up at a time that we are unable to access it, and of course this whole conversation is completely logical to me in my dream state.
That's when I rather unexpectedly drop dead.
(This post is actually extended! Click the below link!)
In a moment of panic, I realize that I exist in ethereal form, and for some reason I am standing outside the gate to the Ancient City! No sooner do I conclude this than a digital-yet-diegetic, two-dimensional box appears above me, asking if I want to enter this city. I click on "No," thinking that this will allow me to resurrect in the "real" world, only to find that the powers-that-be have decided instead to resurrect me on the spot I'm standing on.
As soon as I feel my spirit once again entombed by my physical body, I realize I am only at 25% health and EXTREMELY vulnerable. Realizing I have to find a way out of this place, I begin making my way through some dark, rocky hills -- on a general course heading AWAY from the city -- only to find myself repeatedly slaughtered by hostile two-legged, erect-standing creatures. Each time I die the box comes back, but no matter how many times I click on "No" I end up in the exact same place I was when last I died.
My progress severely slowed down by this seemingly-endless onslaught, it is only a matter of time before I find myself joined in this terrible world by my old roommates: JBod, Dar, Isaac and Mitch. Uncertain about what this new comradery means for my fate, my surprise at their cameo is interrupted by the arrival of my old car, the Sharkmobile, which comes screeching out of nowhere and squeals to a stop in front of me. All five of us enter the vehicle (Dar, Isaac and Mitch in the back, JBod is shotgun, and I'm behind the wheel) and peel out, narrowly avoiding another series of vicious attacks.
Once clear of the land surrounding the Ancient City, the landscape becomes much more Utah-esque. In fact, it almost seemed as if I was on Main Street in Lehi, headed towards my parents' place in Eagle Mountain. I also notice that JBod has decided to sit in the middle seat -- right next to me -- rather than the actual shotgun side of the front bench in the Sharkmobile. The roommates in the back all lose it laughing (especially Dar) when they see the look of disgust on my face and the awkward grin on JBod's as I push him away and out of my personal bubble.
After that it gets even fuzzier. Eventually we end up at an airport, but instead of hopping on a plane I get on a ferry with my newfound Asian girlfriend, and the last thing I remember is the ferry leaving port while she and I are trying to find a way to avoid her parents who have also boarded.
Analysis: Oddly enough, a lot of the elements of this dream have real-world connections for me.
Conclusion: I'm somewhat excited for the new Indy flick, I miss my roommates, being in New York has lasting effects, and it's probably good that I'm not gaming much these days.
Posted by The Shark at 3:11 PM 1 comments
Labels: dreams